It’s time for me to let her fly… but I’m not ready…
The truth is I’ve been having a really tough last week.
My little princess had her first transition session for school next year, and I knew it would be hard, but I had absolutely NO idea how gut wrenching an experience it would actually be.
Everyone says to you when you have a baby that you’ll blink and it’ll be over, before you know it they’ll be at school and you’ll wonder where the time went.
I never really thought that it’d be like that, because it seemed like we had forever together to enjoy this amazing little person that we’d created… yet somehow it seems to have gone by in the blink of an eye and I’m now having to let her go onto the next chapter of her life… but I’m not ready… she is… but I’m not…
It was hard for me when she started Childcare and then Kinder as she was so very shy and attached to me. It took so much work to build her confidence and get her to a place where she would happily run off and play with other children and make new friends.
All I ever wanted was to help her be a confident little soul who knew her own worth and when I took her to school transition and pumped her up about how amazing it would be she happily gave me a kiss and hug goodbye and ran off with the other prep kids. She told me that she felt nervous but that she knew she would make friends and have fun. Bless her little cotton socks, she’s so bloody cute and my heart nearly burst as it was so full of pride in her.
Yet on the flip side it was a real heart wrenching moment to watch that little person who was so dependant on me, just run off and start this new chapter in her life without me by her side. It was such a confusing feeling, pride and sadness all intermingled in one.
I honestly could not ask for more than a child that I know is ready for school, who is excited about it and ready to go. It’s such a blessing as I know that there are so many parents out there who are not in this position and would love nothing more than to have a child who is healthy and happy and ready for this step.
On the flip slide though as much as I am grateful, I couldn’t stop the tears that flowed later that night. They were tears for that amazing little baby girl that I have seen take her first breath, shed her first tear, let our her first giggle, give her first hug and kiss and then walk into her school for the first time.
I’ve realised that it’s time for me to let go of the little caterpillar that I bought into this world, as before my very eyes she has grown and changed into the most beautiful butterfly and she’s ready to soar on this next chapter of her life, and I will stand by her side throughout every step she takes, I’ll take a deep breath and remember how blessed I am to have the opportunity to share this special time with my girl.
I’ve opened my hands little butterfly… it’s time for you to soar…