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• SOCIAL MEDIA • RAGE & KINDNESS •

Living through this global pandemic in 2020 has been a challenge for us all in different ways. I’m sure that we have all experienced the rollercoaster of emotions that such extreme change brings, I know myself I’ve experienced feelings of happiness over being with my family more than usual and knowing we are safe in our home and then the lows of feeling isolated from other loved ones, having to restructure my business and the fear and anxiety of the actual virus and keeping my loved ones safe.

Throughout all of this there has been so many other global issues that have been happening too, issues that many people are extremely passionate about and sometimes the extreme views people can take on various issues are quite polarising.

I am absolutely always in favour of speaking our truth and standing up for what we believe in, however I have noticed that particularly in the social media space lately there is a growing amount of negativity, anger, judgement and unnecessary language that seems to be appearing.

I see people sharing things and then others jumping down their throat with opposing views, people linking articles to back-up their arguments, using inappropriate language and honestly, it hurts my heart.

I sometimes wish I could just turn it off and have a social media break, however now more than ever it’s our main tool for communicating with the outside world and I need to be connected to for both my extended family, my business and local groups etc that I am involved in.

I honestly think that a lot of the negativity that is out there at the moment comes from a place of fear. When we feel that we have lost control of our own lives and freedom to some degree, then we may find ourselves coming from a place of fear. People feel even more strongly than usual that they need to defend their standpoint and though doing that they tend to attack the people on the opposing side.

When we come from a place of fear and anger when communicating we are feeding into the negativity that not only surrounds us, but also that lives within us. Getting into a heated debate about an issue that we may be passionate about may make us feel better in that one moment, but what happens is that the anger that we feel when we are busily bashing away at that keyboard actually sits inside of our own energy as well. We may find that later on we snap at someone else for no reason, or feel a pent up burning feeling inside our tummy, perhaps we experience heartburn, clenched fists or jaw or end up with a headache. All of these physical symptoms can be related to carrying anger and rage inside of us.

I would really encourage everyone to think twice before responding to something that we feel may be triggering something inside of us. If we truly feel passionate and want to express our opinion or viewpoint then absolutely we should, however we should try to come from a place of kindness and remember that everyone is not always as informed as we may be. Perhaps they just need to be educated in a gentler, non-aggressive way.

We are living through unprecedented times where our environment is changing from one minute to the next, first we are concerned about a virus, then we are panicking because we cannot buy groceries as the shelves are empty, we are hearing conflicting reports in the media, statistics are being thrown at us every way we turn, we are trying to manage our own mental, emotional and physical health, and now…. we are trying to madly buy face masks…!!

2020 has been an extremely challenging year so far however I truly believe that we can make it better for everyone, including ourselves, by remembering to come from a place of kindness, empathy and understanding to our fellow humans. We might not agree with everyone, and that’s ok, we should keep sharing our view and expressing our feelings however I would encourage us all to take a deep breath first and make sure that we are coming from a place of love and kindness.

The world needs more gentle, loving energy in it right now and every time that we think twice before responding harshly to someone and choose to share our warmth with the world we are contributing in a huge way in balancing back out the scales.

Much love my friends,
Stacey xx

• BACK TO SCHOOL AFTER ISO •

Tomorrow after six weeks of homeschooling and close to ten weeks of isolation for most people, some of our kids are going to be heading back to school.

This is most likely going to be a challenging day/night for most of your little people as the reality of heading back to school tomorrow really hits them. If we think back to our days at school, and some of the anxiety that we would have returning after normal school holidays, you can only imagine what might be going on for them as they try to enter back into a world they have been separated from for quite some time now.

This nervousness may manifest in different ways for your children, they may be overly emotional, full of anxiety and not able to settle or sleep, they may be acting up and a bit more ‘challenging’ in their behaviours or perhaps even be very quiet and withdrawn. You may also have a child who is more than happy to get back to school and filled with excitement about seeing their friends again, which is great! Yahoo! 😊

As a mother of a very anxious little person, and a Kinesiologist who sees a lot of children in regards to school stresses and anxieties, I thought that it might be helpful to share some of the quick little things that you can do to help ease them back into their return to school;

  • Have a chat: sometimes we can avoid discussing things with our children that may make them anxious or upset, however it’s important for your children to hear you validate their feelings. Perhaps start by just sitting down with them or going for a walk in the sunshine and gently bring up how they are feeling about heading back to school.
    Letting them know that you understand and can relate to how they feel helps them to understand that their feelings are completely normal and safe to talk about. Perhaps some statements like “I know that when I had to go back to work I felt a bit sick in my tummy, how are you feeling about school tomorrow?” or “sometimes after holidays I was a bit worried to see my friends again, how do you feel about seeing your friends?”.
  • Talk to them about the reality of the virus and subsequent changes at school: again as I mentioned above, sometimes we can avoid discussing things with our kids that may cause them more upset and the reality of the pandemic is something that may be on that list. It’s a good idea to just cover off with them what you think that they are capable of taking in, as it’s important that they hear some facts from you so that they don’t escalate things in their own heads. They may have overhead your conversations or picked up on things in the news and formed their own opinion on the current situation. Something as simple as explaining to them that school may look a little different when they return, there will be hand sanitizer around that you will need to use more often than before, you may be told to sit in different spots and some of your usual activities and playtime may be different. Reassure them that you are happy for them to return to school and that you know that their teacher is going to guide them through anything that is different so that they understand and feel safe there.
  • Get active: the best way to ground ourselves back in our bodies and get out of our heads is by physically moving. Get your kids outside this afternoon, it’s a nice sunny day so head out for a bike or scooter ride, go for a walk with your dog, take a run around the local oval or set up an obstacle course in the backyard – they’re always lots of fun!
    The more that you can get your kids moving and getting some fresh air and sunshine the more they’ll be able to shake off those yucky feelings that may be sitting inside them at the moment.
  • Have a bath: baths are fantastic for helping our bodies to relax and bring balance to the water element within us, which is where our anxiety can sit. By drawing a nice, warm bath of an evening you can let your little person lay back and float in the beautiful warm water to help them relax their body and mind before they head to bed.
  • Ensure they get enough sleep: this is a big one. I’m sure that bedtimes and wake up times have changes significantly during lockdown, so if you haven’t already you can start by getting them to bed 15-20mins early each night without them noticing and explain that it’s fine if they’re not tired, they can read in bed or just lay there and rest. The important thing is that they are in bed, relaxing and winding down at a better time each night. This will help make their moods less extreme and therefore hopefully reduce the anxiety about returning to school. We all know how important a good nights sleep is and how much better you feel after you’ve had enough sleep!
    If you have crystals in your home, try placing an amethyst or selenite crystal next to their bed as they are fantastic crystals for calming down the nervous system and any sort of emotional energy. They are also fantastic for bringing balance back to the brain and clearing out obsessive thinking. Also try a few drops of lavender on a cotton pad and pop it under their pillow, it’s a beautiful, calming scent which can help them relax and drift off into a peaceful night’s sleep.
  • Have something exciting to look forward to: finally I would suggest having something exciting for your child to look forward to. Calendars are great for this, we have a calendar on the fridge and have little magnets that show what is happening each day. So for this week we have Tuesday to Friday marked for school and then on Saturday we have a special star magnet. This magnet is for a ‘special surprise’ that is happening on Saturday. I’m not entirely sure what that surprise is as yet, but it doesn’t matter as my daughter is so excited to find out what the surprise is so it’s working! Haha
    We will probably do something like a special dinner that she can pick herself, visiting a friend/family member (now that we can!) or perhaps even making a blanket fort and playing boardgames together which is one of her favourite things to do.

It’s such a big unknown time for all of us as we try to navigate this pandemic and all that it entails and anxiety and worry are all very normal emotions to experience. Be gentle with yourself and your little ones and remember that you’re not in this alone – we are all just doing the best that we can.

I hope that you have found something in here that can help you and if you need some extra help in supporting yourself or your child during these challenging times please feel free to reach out to me and we can chat about how a Kinesiology session can help you both.

Much love, Stacey xx

• GRATITUDE • POSITIVITY & TOILET PAPER •

Well I’m sure it’s no surprise to anyone that the topic of my latest blog is centred around the current worldwide pandemic and how that is playing out in our lives.

When I first started hearing stories about the corona virus to be honest, I specifically didn’t take much notice. As I know I’ve told you all before I can tend to be an anxious person, so I never watch the news, or listen to it on the radio. I am constantly ‘hiding’ news stories on my Facebook feed that people share as I know that if I watch or read about the terrible things happening in the world it can cause my anxiety to escalate.

This ignorance however only lasted as long as my next weekly grocery shop when I discovered that I could no longer buy toilet paper, pasta, hand sanitiser (that I use for work), paper hand towel, rice etc. It soon became pretty evident that there was something much bigger than just a ‘virus’ going on and that I had to actually read up on what was going on and how I could do my best to keep my family healthy and safe.

I understand the panic and fears that people have over this worldwide crisis, however the thing that is really upsetting me the most is the behaviour of my fellow humans. I have witnessed people abusing staff members in the supermarket, fighting over items in another’s trolley, people purchasing way more than they could ever need leaving nothing for others and reselling basic items online at exorbitant mark ups for pure greed.

I know that many of us are scared, I get it, I am too but we truly need to be thoughtful about whether we are adding to the pandemonium or helping to calm it down. Our behaviour and attitude helps to guide those around us, and as a naturally anxious person I am hyper aware of my own thoughts, feeling and behaviour at the moment and how they may play out for my family, friends and clients.

So what am I doing to keep myself and my family positive, grounded and focused on the good rather than the bad? The answer is several things, we are obviously following all the usual instructions of regular and thorough hand washing, limiting social interactions and being thoughtful about our purchasing however I thought that it might be helpful to share with you all a few extra things we’re doing at the moment in case you are looking for some alternative ways to deal with our current situation.

Affirmations – this is a huge one for me. Positive affirmations are powerful statements that help to change our thoughts and brain energy. They help your brain to process thoughts in a different way and have been proven to lower stress and assist us with seeing the world in a more positive light. To get the full benefit of your positive affirmations have the written out somewhere that you will see them (ie. on your bathroom mirror, phone background etc) and say them several times a day, out loud to yourself. Some of the positive affirmations that I am using at the moment are:

‘I am safe, secure, healthy and happy’

‘I have a beautiful, warm home filled with love’

‘I am blessed to have food to nourish myself’

‘I am grateful for my healthy body and mind’

‘The universe is full of abundance and can provide for all’

 

Gratitude – I am a person who uses a gratitude diary daily anyway, as does my daughter, so we are pretty good at acknowledging all that we are grateful for. What I have found though is that throughout the last few weeks when I find myself or my family slipping in the panic of the world around us, simply by stating out loud what I am grateful for is helping to shift those anxious feelings.

An example of this would be when I was struggling to find toilet paper in any supermarket. I would literally be at multiple shops every day before and after seeing clients and drove suburbs away to try and locate some. The more I walked into a shop and saw another empty aisle the more my panic rose, so in one particular shop (about our fourth one in a row) my daughter started to panic and cry. It hit her that there is something very wrong with the world at the moment and that it didn’t feel safe. So I sat her down right there in the empty toilet paper aisle and asked her to think about what we had to be grateful for? We randomly starting listing things such as;

‘I’m grateful that if things really got bad, we have friends and family that we could ask to help us’

‘I am grateful that I have a car, with petrol in it that I can drive to these shops and check for toilet paper’

‘I am grateful that we are healthy and well and able to be at home and not in a hospital needing treatment for this virus’

‘I am so very grateful that I’m not driving to all these shops on my own, and that I have you with me to keep me company and keep me smiling’

You get the idea, it’s about grounding us and bringing us back into the positives of our situation and being thankful for what we do have. On a side note after this little episode at Woolies my mother in law came to visit us that weekend and bought a 12 pack of toilet paper with her for us… hehe… see the universe always provides!

Grounding – I have been more mindful of getting us all outside in bare feet on the grass. It’s such a fantastic way to ground your energy and absorb all those beautiful electrons from mother nature back into our bodies. It helps to bring a sense of calm and connection back to the earth and really help to bring the energy that is overworked in our heads back down into our feet again. So if you’re finding that you’re feeling a bit anxious, angry, frustrated, sad or any other emotion at the moment I would highly recommend kicking off your shoes and getting outside on the grass for a bit – send the kids out there too – you’ll be amazed at how much better you can cope with things when you’re energy is grounded.

As always, I’m also using my crystals, oils, flower essences and lots of other remedies that may test up to balance our energies and try to keep the positivity flowing.

I hope that there is a little gem in here that you can take to help yourself, your family and friends through this stressful time that we are experiencing. Please remember that ‘this too shall pass’ and I’m sure in years to come I’ll look back at this blog post and laugh about the fact that it’s centred around buying toilet paper!!

Lots of love, Stacey xx

• BACK • TO • SCHOOL • ANXIETY •

Next week most schools are back for the year and I’ve noticed that there’s a bit of a shift happening in many households at the moment. We’re all creeping back closer to school starting and so our language may be changing with our kids, things like “we’ll need to start to get you to bed earlier soon so that you’re ready for when school goes back” or “you’ll need to try on your uniform so that we can see what still fits and what you need before school goes back”.

These simple little statements that we throw into our everyday vocab without a second thought, can more often than not create little bubbles of anxiety or nervousness in our kids. They suddenly start to think about the fact that they will have a new teacher, new classroom, not be at home anymore during the daytime and whatever other stresses may come along with being back at school.

As a mother of a very anxious little person, and a Kinesiologist who sees a lot of children in regards to school stresses, I thought that it might be helpful to share some of the things that I have found help when you’re getting your children prepared for heading back to school.

  • Start the Conversation Now: sometimes we can avoid discussing things with our children that may make them anxious or upset, like the thought of heading back to school, until it’s time. There is definitely an argument towards not dragging out events that are unavoidable and adding to the stress, however it’s good to give kids and opportunity to express how they are feeling and work though those feelings with you before the day arrives.
    You can start with just sitting down on a quiet afternoon (try to avoid night time as you don’t want it on their mind before they are heading to bed) and chatting to them about how they are feeling. Questions like “what are you most excited about in going back to school?” or “what is something fun that we did on the holidays that you can share on your first day back at school?” will help to keep it positive and light and broach the subject in a gentle way.
  • Remind them of the Positives: if you have a child that is particularly not happy about heading back to school, then sit down on your own in some quiet time and write out a list of things that you know have been positive for them that you can share with them. Some examples may be things like;
    • If they love art, and you can remind them of all the fantastic creative fun things they can create when they’re back at school.
    • They may have a special friend that they haven’t seen in the holidays, remind them that they’ll get to see their friend every day and play together.
    • Perhaps they love a special treat in their lunchbox, remind them that they’ll be getting a special surprise on the first day that you can pack for them.
    • Maybe your child loves to read, you could remind them of the fantastic books that are at school that they’ll get to read once they’re back.
    • Some children love their sports, you could remind them of all the different sports that they’ll be learning this year as part of their sports program.There are many, many more examples of this but it’s just a few ideas to get your mind ticking. Sometimes when we’re feeling anxious or nervous we tend to be a bit ‘glass half empty’ mindset so if you’re able to provide some positive experiences that they can reflect on that will help greatly.
  • Ensure they are getting enough sleep: this is a big one. During the school holidays we can tend to be a bit flexible on bedtimes and routines as children can sleep in during the mornings unless they have to be up for school holiday programs. There are a lot of kids that have very late bedtimes and also struggle to fall asleep as easily due to the fact that they are not being as stimulated during the day. Take a mental note yourself on what time your child is going to bed, and what time they would normally be going to be bed during the school term. If there is a large discrepancy in that time, then make a plan to slowly bring it back to the ideal sleep time over the next week.
    You can start by getting them to bed 15-20mins early each night without them noticing and explain that it’s fine if they’re not tired, they can read in bed or just lay there and rest. The important thing is that they are in bed, relaxing and winding down at a better time each night. This will help make their moods less extreme and therefore hopefully reduce the anxiety about returning to school. We all know how important a good nights sleep is and how much better you feel after you’ve had enough sleep!
  • Do not dismiss their fears: I know that I can be guilty of this one myself sometimes, as it’s easy to be dismissive of the things that they may be afraid of when they’re heading back to school. Saying things like “don’t be silly of course you’ll make new friends” or “stop being so upset you have nothing to be worried about, you’ll love it when you’re there” are actually not very helpful to someone that’s feeling really stressed. Instead it makes them feel like they need to dig their heels in and plead their case to you on why things indeed ARE as bad as what they think!
    Another thing to try when you’re in this situation is to help them work through what they are afraid of, tackle it head on with them and get them to reason out the logic behind their fears, for example if they are afraid they won’t make friends you could ask them have they ever made new friends before (assuming they have) and how did they make those friends? If you’re in a position where they are not great at making friends you could ask them how they think they could speak to someone they don’t know yet, discussing prompting questions they could use like “what did you do on your holidays?” or “who do you go for in the AFL/Basketball?” etc these kind of discussions can help to give them some tools to use.
  • Visit the school or friends: if they are primary school aged children you can take them down to school and let them have a play on the playground, even for high schoolers making a subtle drive past their high school would be a great way to get them familiar with their environment again. If you’re local to the school then perhaps go for a walk and walk around where the school is, or shop at the shopping centre that’s near there. Anything to get them familiar with seeing school again will be helpful in reducing their anxiety levels.
    Another great idea is to set up a playdate with a school friend, just meeting up at a local park or similar will allow them a chance to connect, chat, play and feel comfortable around that person again. Even our closest friends start to feel a little distant after we’ve had week and weeks of holidays, this will help to connect them again and feel much more safe heading back to school.
  • Natural remedies: I absolutely love natural remedies and they are my go-to for most issues we face in our home. I am lucky enough to be a Kinesiologist so I will muscle test what crystals, oils etc we need and then we use whatever tests up. There are however a few favourites that I have that can help with anxiety, they are;
    • Amethyst Crystal – it’s great for calming down the nervous system and any sort of emotional energy. It’s fantastic for bringing balance to the brain and assisting with obsessive thinking and is also great for helping to get a peaceful night’s sleep.
    • Rose Quartz Crystal – this beautiful gentle crystal is such a great all-rounder and is all about self-love. It is also particularly helpful for dealing with anxiety, stress, fears and helps bring a gentleness and softness back into our energy.
    • Essential Oils – some of my favourites for diffusing around the house during times of stress are Lavender, Bergamot, Chamomile, Jasmine and Marjoram.
    • Hold the ESR points – there are two points on our forehead that are called Emotional Stress Release (ESR) points that if very gently held assist to bring the blood back to the front of our brain. This means that we are more present in the now and able to focus on new ideas and solutions to our worries. I find that I often hold these points on my daughters’ head without her even realising when she’s very anxious or upset and I use them many, many times a week in clinic with my clients. The diagram below illustrates where they are located on your head, and remember it’s the very lightest of touch, the less pressure the better.

      Image: Google Images
    • Clearing Spray – I swear by our clearing spray and we use it everywhere in our house! I use the Clearing Spray from By The Bay Kinesiology and it’s amazing. You simply mist it over the head and it helps to clear any sort of emotions that you are wanting to let go of and assists in bringing balance again. I also use it in my daughter’s bedroom to help keep her space clear and fresh and not carry over some of her worries from the day prior.

So that is my hints and tips on helping your little ones in the lead up to school starting back next week, I truly hope that you’ve found at least one little nugget in there that you can either pass onto someone that may need it or to use yourself.

It’s such a big time of the year for both parents and children and anxiety and worry are all very normal emotions to experience leading up to periods of change. Be gentle with yourself and your little ones and remember that you’re not in this alone. If you need some help in supporting your child’s transition please feel free to reach out to me and we can chat about how a Kinesiology session can help you both.

Much love,
Stacey 💜 xx

• TIME • TO • PAR-TEA •

We recently celebrated my daughter’s birthday and as usual I had lots of fun pulling all the details together.
Traditionally we have always had quite a big party for her birthday, however this year we decided to go a bit more low-key and so she asked to have her closest friends over for a little tea party, and then our family over for dinner.

Well I when I saw low-key I guess my daughter summed it up best, as one day I was showing her the lace fans I’d found for her friends to have as a gift at the party she looked at me and said “Gee Mumma, I love you but you really just can’t do a little party can you?!” haha…!!
She’s pretty spot on, I just can’t help myself! I get caught up in the details and find myself swept away in coordinating tablecloths with teacups and searching out fake pearl necklaces in op-shops.

Over the years I have had my fair share of other people who have little digs at me about being too over the top, or doing too much for her birthday and I’ve had to learn to brush it off. The truth is that there are very few people in this world that could ever understand what her birthday means to me and why it is so important to us that we celebrate it as big as we do every year, and I’m ok with that.

For me all birthdays are special, they are a chance to celebrate the people in your life that you love. Making cards, giving gifts, blowing up balloons, having a special lunch, eating a slice of your favourite cake – you should do whatever it is that makes you happy and celebrate in a way that feels right for you and your family. I think the biggest motivator for me is seeing her face light up when she sees everything come together, we are raising a very appreciative, grateful little soul and she knows exactly what goes into making her day so special and thanks me a million times for all my effort – so that definitely fills up my heart.

I’ve included some pictures of my daughter’s latest birthday party below to hopefully provide a little inspiration if you’re ever looking to do a tea party (you can click on the images to enlarge them). I put together all the details my self, and thought you might like to know some hints and tips on how it all came together;

• The beautiful bunting was made by a friend of mine for another event and she was kind enough to let me borrow it for my daughters party decorations. She is so clever that to make this she purchased old sheets in the patterns she was after from Ops Shops and tore them into strips. She then spent (many hours!) knotting them onto some lovely twine and they turned into the amazing hanging masterpiece you see in the photos.

• The cups, saucers and teapots were all sourced over time from Op Shops, Salvo Stores etc. and were all generally between $3 – $6 each.

• The balloons were purchased off ebay to match my theme and were much more affordable than balloons I’d seen in the party shops, then I had them blown up at Big W. They will blow up balloons that are not purchased there, you just need to sign a waiver to say that if they’re inferior quality and pop they are not responsible.

• The tablecloth was just a plain white one I had, then I grabbed a lace curtain from the Op Shop for $2, gave it a wash and cut it in half to go over the square table.

• Each of the pearl necklaces were also found at the Salvo’s store and were $1 each. I only needed a couple to add to the theme I was going for.

• I found the cute lace fans at our local $2 shop for $1.50 each and though that they were so sweet and would make a lovely gift for the girls attending the tea party.

• The amazing cake and cookies were made by a colleague of my hubby’s who is sooooo clever and talented, so I can take no credit for them at all! haha

• The tea cup lolly treats are simply a marshmallow stuck onto a tic-toc biscuit, then with a freckle stuck onto the marshmallow. You then cut a musk lifesaver in half and stick that on the side of the marshmallow for the handle. To ‘stick’ each element together you simply mix some icing sugar and water until it’s a paste like consistency.

• The wooden No 7 was from our local $2 shop and we decorated it by tracing the letter onto some pretty paper in our colour theme, and then sticking it on and decorating it with stickers.

• The cupcakes were made by me, and the little flowers on top were pre-made icing flowers purchased from Woolies in the cake decorating section. They were so easy to make and tasted amazing (chocolate fudge! Yum!)

• The marshmallows were stuck on paper straws to make them look more fun, and also were then used by the kids for their drinks.

• The candle holders were items that I already had around the home, so I was able to use these as part of the decorations.

• The napkins were also found in our local $2 shop. They had a large selection of napkins and looking through the box I found these gorgeous ones which were right on theme for us!

Hope that these little snippets of information help to give you a few ideas on how you can use items in your local Op shops to help bring together lots of little elements to create an overall party theme that you’re looking for.

Now of course if your birthdays consist of no decorations or party at all, that’s completely fine too! Everyone should do what makes them happy, and if yours happens to be a par-TEA like our last one was then I hope you’ve found some inspiration here.

Much love,
Stacey 💜 xx